Chuck Norris terrorizes terrorism.
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Chuck Norris is like an F5 Tornado...
When you see him coming you better run for cover and pray to God he doesn't find you...
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a beard on his face.
Chuck Norris' beard has a face.
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Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks.
They fold under pressure.
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There was no Big Bang.
Chuck Norris arm wrestled himself and the energy produced created the universe.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
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Chuck Norris always knows where x is.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris can't fly, gravity just looks the other way when he leaves the ground.
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The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
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