Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris drew a triangle with four sides.
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Time travel is possible.
But you must first get past Chuck Norris...
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Some people like to eat frogs' legs.
Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs.
Hence, snakes.
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There are no comets.
Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
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