Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS.
Chuck Norris decides where he is.
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People with Pogonophobia (fear of beards) do not fear Chuck Norris beard.
They are too scared of his entire existance to focus on 1 part.
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Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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Chuck Norris can make a rock grow.
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Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck norris plays frisbee with his retinas.
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Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine.
He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself.
Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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