Demons don't hunt Chuck Norris...
He is hunting them!
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
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Chuck Norris is a hunter.
But Chuck Norris does not hunt.
That implies the possibility of failure.
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Two deer hunters were not having any luck so they asked for advice from an old-timer.
"You can just about guarantee a deer if you learn to hunt with dogs," he said.
The two hunters got a trained deer dog and hit the woods.
At the end of the day and still empty-handed, one hunter said to the other, "Maybe tomorrow we'll get one if we throw the dog out of a higher treestand."
The world ends on December 21st, 2012.
Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.
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When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens.
And dies.
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2012 is the predicted date for the end of the world.
The only rational explanation is Chuck Norris.
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Deer Hunter.
A sportsman, and father of 3 sons, was anxious to share his latest kill with his family for Sunday dinner.
He didn't want his sons to refuse tasting the delicious venison, so he sat the boys down to dinner without telling them what the meat was they were about to eat.
"Oh come on Dad," said the oldest son. "What is this meat?"
"Just taste it," said the father, "You will love it."
The boys eyed each other nervously and put a piece of the meat on their forks.
"Give us a little hint.", pleaded the second son.
"Only if you take a bite.", said the father.
As each boy took a cautious bite of the venison, the father continued, "Let me think, your mother calls me this from time to time."
The oldest boy shouted, "Spit it out boys, it's asshole!"
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump.
"Well, go in the bushes."
"What should I use to wipe my ass?"
"Use a dollar bill."
A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands.
"What happened?" asks his friend.
"I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
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