Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
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Chuck Norris can travel through time by running 88 miles per hour.
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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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Chuck Norris won the Nascar season, he was driving a bike.
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Chuck Norris doesn't vote.
He elects!
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Chuck Norris can win a Grammy from coughing.
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Chuck Norris went to the sun and spent two nights.
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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.
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