Chuck Norris once taught a book to read.
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
Chuck Norris can fly around the world on a paper airplane.
When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
The original CBS Survivor series was filmed in Chuck's mansion. No episode aired, as no one survived.
Chuck Norris can infect a mac with pc viruses.
Chuck Norris is so awesome, he can dodge rain.
Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.