Armageddon is defined as the day Chuck Norris gets bored with us.
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Global warming is the result of Chuck Norris getting mad.
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?"
Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris.
It was more "humane".
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.
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If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.
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Chuck Norris won the gold, silver and bronze medals at the Olympics.
In the same event. From home.
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A time paradox was invented when Chuck Norris went back in time to raise himself.
Now he has provoked the event 2012.
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Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Davie Jones is afraid of Chuck Norris' Locker.
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