Armageddon is defined as the day Chuck Norris gets bored with us.
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Chuck Norris could catch that damn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!
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What occurs twice in The Beginning, never in The End, but is at The End of Everything?
Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris replaced Roy Scheider, the movie would have been known as Broken Jaws, and would have only lasted 12 minutes.
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There was no Big Bang.
Chuck Norris arm wrestled himself and the energy produced created the universe.
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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
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Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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Chuck Norris eats rainbows to taste the Skittles.
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Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Every time Satain goes to sleep, He has to pray to God hoping Chuck Norris does't get him at night.
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