Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Of course you would.
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Chuck Norris' tears would save lives, if he'd cry.
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Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices.
But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
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Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
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Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
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Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink.
If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
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Chuck Norris was worshipped as a god by the Eskimos.
That is why they had igloos modeled after his signature move.
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When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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