Joke #9664

Chuck Norris doesn't have an attitude. He has a personality you can't handle.
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When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech. He actually does it.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
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When Chuck Norris plays the game Clue, the answer is always everyone in every room with a roundhouse kick!
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
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Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
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