Chuck Norris can fly a submarine.
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In a fight with the drill sergeant from "Full Metal Jacket," I'm afraid Chuck would gracefully decline to fight.
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If he wanted to, Chuck Norris could rob a bank.
By phone.
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In the medical community, death is referred to as "Chuck Norris Disease".
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Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
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The only difference between nunchucks and the legs of Chuck Norris is that wood eventually breaks.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
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Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee.
This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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