Chuck Norris can fly a submarine.
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Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
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Chuck Norris sees dead people...and they run.
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Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick with his arms.
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Aliens do exist.
They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
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Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean.
The tsunamis were killing people.
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The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"
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Chuck Norris can't be in a 3D movie because the entire room would feel his roundhouse kicks.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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Chuck Norris once went logging and took down a forest.
Then he came back for his axe.
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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