Dreams about Chuck Norris are in 4D.
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They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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Chuck Norris actually went to Rome by all roads. At the same time.
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Chuck Norris created Heavy Metal when he was upset.
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China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
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Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
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When Chuck Norris goes through airport security he makes them take their shoes off.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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