Chuck Norris has hair of steel wool.
That's why his mullet never moves.
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If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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Chuck Norris can eat rice with one chop stick.
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Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow?
You just don't follow him that close!
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Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Every morning Chuck Norris eats a bowl of nails for Breakfast... without milk.
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Chuck Norris can watch an episode of 60 Minutes in a half-hour.
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Nations fight other nations but wouldn't have balls enough to go toe-to-toe with Chuck Norris.
Remember Atlantis?
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Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
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Coffee doesn't wake up Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris wakes coffee up.
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