Chuck Norris uses flatbed trailers as roller skates.
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real.
It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
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Lou Gehrig considered himself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth, no one knew that it was because he was soon getting away from Chuck Norris.
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Tungsten steel was discovered in Chuck Norris' DNA.
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When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
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Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way.
We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
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For every victim of a Chuck Norris round house kick, there is a star.
As you can see, there are a lot.
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Ghosts actually have their own kind of tv.
The show that scares them the most is called "Chuck Norris Caught On Tape".
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Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
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