Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.