Chuck Norris made the llama extinct. Never spit in his face.
If Clint Eastwood told Chuck Norris to get off his lawn... Chuck would get the hell off his lawn!
Chuck Norris's urin is said to add 300 horse power when added to your gas.
Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car he walks.
Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch... Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
Chuck Norris walked into a bar. "OUCH!" said the bar.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Chuck Norris will be the star lead in the remake of the movie "300" it will now be called "1"
If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...