Chuck Norris made the llama extinct.
Never spit in his face.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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Chuck Norris once appeared on celebrity wipeout.
They had to end the season after he destroyed the sucker punch wall with his chin.
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Love is one way to get to a persons heart the other is Chuck Norris' fists.
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236.
It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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Chuck Norris is never late... time is just early.
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an ATM PIN – the machine just spits out cash – at every bank!
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Chuck Norris has won tennis match against a wall.
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Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
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