Joke #9973

What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit? The first herd shot round the world.
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Why did a gambler scare everyone out swimming? He was a card shark.
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What do you get if you cross a cow, a french fry, and a sofa? A cowch potato.
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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he can make you curious.
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One day, Little Johnny's grandmother sent him to the water hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and ran back to grandma's house as fast as he could. "Where's my bucket and my water?" She asked. "I can't get any water from that water hole, there's a mean ol' alligator down there!" "Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnny. He's been there for years, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!" "Well, Grandma," replied Johnny, "if he's as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain't fit to drink!"
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Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet. That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
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A little kid gets on a city bus, sits right behind the driver, and starts talking loudly, "If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow, I'd be a little bull." The driver gets annoyed as the kids continues to yammer on. "If my dad was an rooster and my mom a hen, I would be a little chick." The kid goes on and on with all the animals he knows, when finally, the bus driver yells, "What if your dad was a bum and your mom was a drunk?" The kid smiles and says, "I'd be a bus driver."
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What do you call an affectionate rabbit? A tender, loving hare.
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Why couldn't the skunk use her phone? It was out of odor!
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A guy asks his waiter at a restaurant how they prepare their chicken. The waiter goes blank for a second, then says, "Nothing special really... We just tell them they're going to die..."
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More jokes about: animal, black humor, death, food, time
Yo mama is so stupid, when I offered her animal crackers she said no thanks, I'm a vegetarian.
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