The best jokes about men

A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face." The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop, love, men
What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.
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has 55.25 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: men
Jennifer, wanna go to my place? I am not Jennifer But I didn't ask about that...
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: men, women
When you have a man staring at a naked Playboy model, be sure that he doesn’t wonder if she knows cooking, or if she plays piano or if she has a nice personality either!
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: food, men, music
How can you tell if a novel is homosexual? The hero always gets his man in the end.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: men
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A widow.
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has 54.89 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: husband, men, women
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy." The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds. He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic. He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns. After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again. The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"
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has 54.80 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: dating, men
Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Because not one will stop and ask for directions.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: men
Two men walked into a restaurant, the first one asks for tea. The second also asks for tea. "And make sure the glass is clean," he tells the waiter. When the waiter returns with the two glasses of tea he asks, "Which one of you asked for the clean glass?"
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: men
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"
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has 54.58 % from 204 votes. More jokes about: marriage, math, men, wedding, women
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