Q: Why do women have periods? A: Because they deserve them.
Question: What’s six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild? Answer: Money.
Why did the woman cross the road? That's not the point,what's she doing out of the kitchen?
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
A serious drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and hugged her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "You worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
Question: Why did the Army send do many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf? Answer: They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.
A single woman who retired just a few months back walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch in her neighborhood. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?" "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." "That's amazing," the woman said. "How old are you?' "Twenty-six," he said.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb? 11, 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it..
Question: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women? Answer: Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you.
Q: What does a shot of Everclear and a Woman have in common? A: Both of them make men start talking nonsense!