The best kids jokes

The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, god, husband, kids, life
Two men are chatting; "My son asked me: 'Daddy, where do children come from?'" "It's not a big deal... Today kids are interested in that matter on the early years." "Yeah men, but the real issue here is that my son is... married... for five years!"
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, kids, marriage
When terrorists feed their children, do they use the airplane method of "open wide" while making airplane noises? Or do they just smash it into their faces?
Vote: has 65.08 % from 57 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, kids, racist, terrorist
Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, sex, single, time
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In a stork?
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, kids, stupid
Chuck Norris was an only child. Eventually.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, tax
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fat, health, kids
How should you treat a baby goat? Like a kid.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, baby, kids
Teacher: What happened in 1869? Student: Mahatma Gandhi was born. Teacher: What happened in 1873? Student: Gandhi was four years old
Vote: has 64.76 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, student, teacher, time