The best kids jokes

Q: What's the difference between morbid and black humour? A: Well, black humour is like 10 children in one rubbish bin, whereas morbid humour is like one child in 10 rubbish bins.
Vote: has 65.86 % from 48 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, kids, morbid
A little boy was so exited because his mom told him he is getting a baby brother. He repeated that to his techer every day, when he came to school, "Im getting a brother." One day his mom alllowed him to feel the baby's kicks in her belly. The next day he came to school and didnt say anything to his teacher, so the teacher asked him, what happend to his brother. He replyed, "I think mommy ate him."
Vote: has 65.80 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, kids, school, teacher
The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day, she asked, "George, why has your school work been so poor lately?" "I’m in love," the boy replied. Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, "With whom?" "With you," he said. "But George," she said gently, "don’t you see how silly that is? It’s true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don’t want a child." "Oh, don’t worry," the boy said reassuringly, "I’ll use a rubber."
Vote: has 65.80 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, kids, love, school, teacher
Knock Knock! Who's there? Justin Justin who? Justin time for dinner!
Vote: has 65.58 % from 111 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids, knock-knock
A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar. The salesman says, "Little boy is your mother home?" Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, "What do you think?"
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beer, drug, kids
A little girl took her report card home and showed it to mom. The mother was very disappointed by all the very low grades. "Well look on the bright side" said the child, "you know for sure I don't cheat."
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids, school, stupid
Kids dream about having superpowers. Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 65.32 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
Should women have children after 35? "No, 35 children are enough!"
Vote: has 65.26 % from 399 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, kids, women
Once upon time, there were three friends playing on a beach. One kid's parents were good business people. The second kid lives in a good family where he is taught to respect his elders. The third kid was a poor redneck with an abusive father. Anyways, they were playing on the beach when a helicopter crashed down into the water. They saw a man drowning and all raced to save him. As they pulled the man to shore they realized it was Obama. The president then said, "Thank you kids for saving me! I'll give you each one wish!" The first kid said he wanted a helicopter. The second kid wished for some money. And the redneck asked for a wheel chair. Obama, concerned, asked why the poor boy wouldn't want some money for his family. The kid replied, "Cause when pap finds out what I've done, I ain't gonna be walking for a pretty long time."
Vote: has 65.25 % from 74 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, kids, old people, political, racist
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids


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