The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Two men are chatting; "My son asked me: 'Daddy, where do children come from?'" "It's not a big deal... Today kids are interested in that matter on the early years." "Yeah men, but the real issue here is that my son is... married... for five years!"
When terrorists feed their children, do they use the airplane method of "open wide" while making airplane noises? Or do they just smash it into their faces?
Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In a stork?
Chuck Norris was an only child. Eventually.
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
How should you treat a baby goat? Like a kid.
Teacher: What happened in 1869? Student: Mahatma Gandhi was born. Teacher: What happened in 1873? Student: Gandhi was four years old