The best kids jokes

How do teddy bears keep their den cool in summer? (They use bear conditioning!)
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: What does a nosey pepper do? A: Gets jalapeno business!
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has 27.66 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: business, kids
Q: What did the big turnip say to the little turnip A: When did you turn up?
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has 27.66 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: kids
When is a door sweet and tasty? When its jammed!
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: kids
Four year-old Harry, who could tell time, was playing with a wall clock when her grandpa visited. Later, when he was putting on his coat to leave, the grandpa asked him what time it was. He looked at the clock blankly, and then answered in a triumphant way, "It's time for you to go, grandpa!"
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: kids, time
A local charity organization realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?" The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?" Embarrassed, the donation seeker mumbled, "Um ... no." The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?" The person coming for donation began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again. "or that my sister`s husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer`s voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!" The person who came asking for donation felt completely humiliated and said simply, "I had no idea..." On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don`t give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"
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has 25.64 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: death, kids, lawyer, medical, money
There once was two people Lisa and Brian They got married and had a child. The only problem was that the child was only a head, he had no arms, legs or torso. So all his life he was picked on and teased and he always wished he had a body. So when he turned 21 his dad took him to a bar and let him have his first beer ever. When he drank a whole bottle an arm popped out. When he drank more bottles more body parts popped out. After drinking many beers he finally had a whole body. As they left the bar, he was very drunk and was hit by a bus and he died. The moral of the story "Quit while you're a head."
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has 24.95 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, kids, life, marriage
What kind of rocks do young geologists play with? Marbles.
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has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: Why do two skunks argue? A: Because they like to kick up a stink.
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has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: kids
A man married an illiterate wife. After two years of marriage, they gave birth to a son called EFe. One day his mother asked him to read is multiplication table and he started immediately but when he reached 4multiply by 4 he mistakingly said 8 they mother angrily slapped him and told him the answer wasn't 8 but 44. The boy cried and reported what happened to the father, the father took him back and angrily told the wife to tell him the correct answer and the woman hurriedly say 4mutiply by 4 is it not 44. The man now calmed down and sai d u are Lucky that you got the answer if not I would have disgraced you here. I hope they are all brilliant.
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has 22.01 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: communication, kids, marriage, mean
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