The best jokes about life

"Killed it" is a figure of speech implying someone stopped the banter. To Chuck Norris that's just the motto of his life.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, life
Teens are at an awkward stage in their lives. They know how to make phone calls they just don't know how to end them.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, phone, teen
What is height of Activelaziness? Asking for a lift to house while on a morning walk.
Vote: has 58.98 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fitness, life
A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?" "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." "That's amazing," the woman said. "How old are you?' "Twenty-six," he said.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, alcohol, life, old people
Which runs faster, hot or cold? Hot. Everyone can catch cold.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
When we moved to the US I was 8 years old. I remember asking my father if I can have an allowance? When he asked me what that was, I said you're allowed to give me money.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, family, geography, life, money
Slept like a log last night........ Woke up in the fireplace.
Vote: has 58.58 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
'My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.''
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy." I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, "Okay, you're ugly too!"
Vote: has 58.52 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
What do you call hemorrhoids on a fag? Speed bumps.
Vote: has 58.52 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: gay, life