The best jokes about life

A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, "I'm Eddie, I'm here to pick up Betty. We're going for spaghetti, is she ready?" No. The second beau came to the door and said, "I'm Joe, I'm here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?" No. The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. "Hello, my name is Chuck." The farmer shot Chuck.
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has 57.62 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dating, food, life
Mary's father has 5 daughters, 1. Nana 2. Nono 3. Nini 4. Nene What is the fifth daughters name?
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has 57.43 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids, life
What do you call a truck full of dildos? Toys for Twats.
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has 57.18 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: car, gay, life, masturbation
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas? Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
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has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Christmas, life, music
A zebra has wondered his whole life whether he was a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes. When he dies and goes to heaven he asks God the question "Am I a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are what you are" The zebra goes to his friends and tells them what God had said and that he still doesn't know the answer to his question. One of his friends says, "Well, that means you are a white zebra with black stripes" The zebra asks him why and the friend says, "Because otherwise God would have said 'You is what you is'"
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has 57.10 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: animal, god, life, racist
What do you call hemorrhoids on a fag? Speed bumps.
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has 57.01 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: gay, life
Sometimes, during the movie previews, I'll turn to the stranger sitting next to me and whisper, "We should really go see that together."
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has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: life
Jake was watching vigilantly at his dying wife's side. "Sleep now, it's all right," he told her. But she kept trying to sit up and said, "Honey, I really need to tell you something." Finally Jake let her get it off her chest. "Jake, honey, I need to tell you something before I die. During the last two months, I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father." "Don't worry about it," Jake said, "I already know. Why do you think I poisoned you?"
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has 56.92 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: death, life, wife
Whats the difference between a jeweler and a jailer? One sells watches and one watches cells.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: life
Two truck drivers trying to drive under a bridge. Driver, "Oh no, the height of bridge is 2.7m and our truck is 3m." 2nd driver, "it's ok, just go, there is no cops around."
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop, life
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