The best jokes about life

Patient: "Doctor, I can’t sleep." Doctor: "Lie at of edge of your bed and you will sleep off."
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

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What's lil Wayne's favorite kind of pizza? Little Seizures. What? To soon?
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More jokes about: life, music
Without you I can't breath. I love you so much my nose.
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More jokes about: life, love
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.
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More jokes about: life, travel
About 4,000 years ago: God: "I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!" Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note* God: "Correction, I shall create a great flood!"
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, god, life, money, time
Q: Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? A: Cause it got stuck in a crack.
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More jokes about: life
St Peter is standing at heaven's gate when a man walks up. "Welcome to heaven my son. What did you do with your life?" "I was a policeman," he responded. "What kind of policeman?" St Peter asked. "I was a vice officer. I kept dangerous narcotics out of the hands of kids." "Wonderful my son, welcome to heaven. Pass through the gates." A few moments later a second man walks up. "Welcome to heaven my son. What did you do with your life?" "I was a policeman," he responded. "What kind of policeman?" St Peter asked. "I was a traffic officer. I kept the roads and highways safe for travelers." "Well done. Pass through the gates into paradise." A few moments later a third man walks up. "Welcome to heaven my son. What did you do with your life?" "I was a policeman," he responded. "What kind of policeman?" St Peter asked. "I was a Military Policeman, Sir." "Excellent my son, I've gotta take a leak, watch the gate will ya?"
Vote: has 59.93 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cop, heaven, life
If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!
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What do mopeds and fat ladies have in common? They're both a great ride until someone sees you on one.
Vote: has 59.80 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life