The best marriage jokes

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing – and then they marry him.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Always talk to your wife when you’re making love – assuming there’s a phone handy.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: marriage
The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up, I said ''Did you get my drift?''.
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has 36.23 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: marriage
What’s it called when a woman is paralysed from the waist down? Marriage.
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has 36.23 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: marriage
What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy? Oh no, not snake and pygmy pie again!
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has 36.23 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, marriage, wife
Husband to wife: ‘You have a flat chest and hairy legs. Tell me, have you ever been mistaken for a man?’ ‘No,’ replies his wife. ‘Have you?’
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has 35.78 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: marriage
An angry man is coming home and shouts to his wife, "I know everything!" His wife reacts right away, "Is that so? Then tell me please. Who is the fifth highest peak in the world?"
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has 35.78 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: geography, marriage, wife
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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has 35.32 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: dirty, Fathers day, marriage, sex
Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism.
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has 35.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: marriage, men
Husband: I want to go somewhere on holiday this year I've never been before. Wife: Well, how about the kitchen?
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has 35.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: marriage
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