A man and his wife enter a dentist's office.
The wife says "I need a tooth pulled.
No gas or Novocain -- I'm in a terrible hurry.
Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible."
"You're a brave woman," says the dentist.
"Now, show me which tooth it is."
The wife turns to her husband and says, "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
It's legal to earn money playing hockey
Many people play hockey even after they're married
The puck's always hard
The protective equipment is reusable
It lasts at least an hour
A two-on-one or a three-on-one is not uncommon
You always know how big the stick is
You can clean your stick in public without anyone minding
You can change players on the fly
You don't have to be embarrassed if you don't get the puck up
Everyone is finished when the buzzer sounds
Your parents cheer when you score
Periods last only 20 minutes
You're sure to get it at least twice a week
You can tell your friends about it afterwards.
They are a fastidious couple.
She’s fast and he’s hideous.
What do you do if your best friend runs off with your husband?
Miss her.
Pity her.
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"
Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"
Contrary to popular belief, Harry’s mother and father were married.
Not to each other.
But they were married.
I had two women in my bed the other day.
I got home from work and discovered my wife is having a lesbian affair.
Boy: I would go to the end of the world for you!
Girl: yes, but would you stay there….
Vote:
Since I got married I haven’t looked at another woman.
My wife put me off them.