The best mean jokes

I like my women like my morning coffee, falling off the roof of my car as I peel out of a gas station parking lot.
Vote:
has 69.19 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: car, mean, women
Me driving by a Taco Bell. Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Two weeks later: Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Background Checks Required.
Vote:
has 69.19 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: food, management, mean
My wife said to me, "For our anniversary I want to go somewhere I've never been before." So I said, "Try the kitchen!"
Vote:
has 68.66 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: anniversary, communication, marriage, mean, travel
Not the people who posted this sign at a bookstore that was going out of business: "Sorry, no public restroom. Try amazon.com."
Vote:
has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: business, customer service, mean
The new office-boy came into his boss's office and said, "I think you re wanted on the phone, sir." "What d you mean, you think?" demanded the boss. "Well, sir, the phone rang, I answered it and a voice said is that you, you old fool?"
Vote:
has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, mean, office, phone
Little boy says to his father: "Daddy, I heard on the news that cigarettes have become much more expensive. Does it mean that you're going to smoke less from now on?" And father replies: "No, son. I will smoke as much as a have. But, you'll be eating less!"
Vote:
has 68.60 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dad, food, kids, mean, money
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat". The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as. "I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
Vote:
has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: accountant, Halloween, kids, mean, men
One day, a guy walks into a pub and orders a beer. His friend walks up and sees his red eyes and asks, "Dude, are you okay? You look exhausted". He replies,"Yeah, I heard about what happened in your house yesterday too. Tough." His friend says, "Yeah, I wish I could trust my wife a little more - wait... How did you know about that?" He says,"I was there" and continues chugging his beer.
Vote:
has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: beer, communication, friendship, marriage, mean
Q: VWhy didn't the fixed dog cross the road? A: Because he didn't have the balls to do it.
Vote:
has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: dog, mean
Q: What is the most dangerous part of a motorcycle? A: The nut between the seat and the handlebars.
Vote:
has 67.57 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: insulting, mean
<<<12131415
More jokes →
Page 12 of 22.