The best mean jokes

Yo mammas so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, her reflection said," I quit." And walked away.
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has 72.17 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, ugly, Yo mama
Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers? A: They grow taller!
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: insulting, lawyer, mean, viagra
My wife's cooking is so bad we usually pray after our food.
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: food, mean, religious, wife
Boy: "Hi, my name is Milk. I'll do your body good." Girl: "Sorry, I'm Lactose intolerant!"
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: flirt, health, mean, men, women
Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: communication, fart, marriage, mean, sex
I decided to grab a burger at a drive-thru. There were no cars in sight, so I rolled up to the pay window. "We're still serving breakfast. And you have to order at the speaker," the clerk scolded. I drove all the way around the building to the squawk box and ordered a breakfast sandwich. "I'm sorry," she said, "we are now serving lunch."
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: car, customer service, food, mean, time
Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth. Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, history, mean, science
I just had an argument with a girl I know. She was saying how that it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response, I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up.
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has 70.92 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, women
"Anton, do you think I'm a bad mother?" "My name is Paul."
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has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: family, mean
If you see me smiling, I'm probably thinking of doing something evil. If I'm laughing, I've already done it.
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has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: life, mean