Q: Why does California have the most lawyers, and New Jersey, the most toxic waste dumps?
A: New Jersey got first pick.
Two skunks observed a deer hunter sneaking through the woods with a rifle.
"I hope he's not going to shoot at us," said one skunk.
The second skunk bowed his head and said, "Let us spray."
Vote: Joke has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, hunting, mean
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, hunting, mean
Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers?
A: They grow taller!
Yo mammas so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, her reflection said," I quit."
And walked away.
Vote: Joke has 71.05 % from 86 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, mean, ugly, Yo mama
More jokes about: communication, mean, ugly, Yo mama
Autocorrect can kiss my ask!
Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
I decided to grab a burger at a drive-thru.
There were no cars in sight, so I rolled up to the pay window.
"We're still serving breakfast. And you have to order at the speaker," the clerk scolded.
I drove all the way around the building to the squawk box and ordered a breakfast sandwich.
"I'm sorry," she said, "we are now serving lunch."
I lost 125 pounds.
It took me a long time, and it cost me a lot of money, but I finally divorced the bitch!
Boy: "Hi, my name is Milk. I'll do your body good."
Girl: "Sorry, I'm Lactose intolerant!"
I got so fed up with trick or treaters at Halloween that in the end I turned the lights out and pretended I wasn't in.
Forget the ships.
My lighthouse, my rules...