The best mean jokes

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: math, mean, school
Harry's wife says, "Harry, do these jeans make my ass look like the side of the house?" He says, "No, our house isn't blue."
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has 72.71 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: communication, marriage, mean
A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave him a huge stack of old bills.
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has 72.71 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: mean, money, work
Q: Why does California have the most lawyers, and New Jersey, the most toxic waste dumps? A: New Jersey got first pick.
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has 72.71 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: geography, lawyer, mean
I lost 125 pounds. It took me a long time, and it cost me a lot of money, but I finally divorced the bitch!
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: divorce, mean, money, time
Q: How do you circumcise a redneck? A: You kick his sister in the jaw.
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: family, mean, redneck
Q: What's the worst part about sex? A: When they wake up!
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has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: mean, sex
"I'm sorry for throwing red wine over all your dresses in the wardrobe last night," I told my girlfriend. "I've spent all day getting the stains out just to show how much you mean to me." "Oh, that's really nice," she said. "What did you use to remove the stains?" "Scissors," I replied.
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has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, relationship, wine
Q: What did the little black kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.
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has 72.38 % from 260 votes. More jokes about: black people, Christmas, kids, mean
A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I buzz you in. Come inside and elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?" "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? "What... You're coming empty handed?"
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has 72.26 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: family, jewish, mean