The best jokes about men

How can you tell if a man is lying? You can see his lips moving.
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Men are like... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
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Dad: Hey son want to hear a joke? Son: Yeah! Dad: Pussy. Son: I don't get it. Dad: Exactly...
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Why did God create man? Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
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What does a man call true love? An erection.
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Why do men want to vote for a female President? Because we'd only have to pay her half as much.
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Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.
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Q: What do you call a man who has lost 98% of his brain? A: A widower.
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A man walked into the doctor's office and said: "Doc, I've eaten something that disagrees with me." A voice from his stomach replies: "No you haven't."
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Man to a woman: "Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?" Woman: "No." Man: "Lets have lunch sometime…"
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More jokes about: men, sex, women