The best jokes about men

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men
2 cannibals having dinner. 1st says to 2nd, "Your wife makes a lovely stew." 2nd answers, "Yes but I will miss her."
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men
I only wanted to have a child, not marry one.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: marriage, men
Q: Why do liberals travel in threes? A: One to read, one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men, travel
Men are like Bluetooth. When they’re close they’re connected, when they move further they start looking for new equipment.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
Adam goes to God and says, "I would like a mate to please me and make living joyful. She should be beautiful and perfect in every way. God says, "I can do that, but it will cost you a testicle, a kidney, and one eye." To which Adam replied, "Well, what can I get for a rib?"
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
Two gays were at a dance. As they were jigging about the floor with each other. Two massive guys entered the hall 6 foot 6 20 stone and full of muscle One gay asked his mate "Is that the bouncers that have just come in?" "No" grinned the other,"That's the raffle."
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, men, party
What do you call a man with half a brain? Gifted.
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has 62.44 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: men
I just had an argument with a girl I know. She was saying how that it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response, I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up.
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has 62.43 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, women
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