The best jokes about men

If you catch a man…throw him back.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?" "Of course not, dear," replied the mother, "Why would you think that?" "The tombstone back there said... 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, death, lawyer, men
Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, fat, men, Yo mama
What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women? Exchange him.
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: god, men, women
Man walks into a shop and sees a very handsome dog. He asks the shop assistant, "Does your dog bite?" "No, my dog doesn't bite." The man happily tries to pet the dog, but the dog attacks him viciously. A little later he stumbles to the shop clerk, "Hey, you said your dog doesn't bite!" The shop clerk shrugs, "He doesn't. But that wasn't my dog."
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: customer service, dog, men
Question: Why do men die before their wives? Answer: Because they want to.
Vote: has 60.69 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, men, wife, women
Yesterday, government scientists suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.
Vote: has 60.66 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beer, men, political, science, women
How can you tell if a man is lying? You can see his lips moving.
Vote: has 60.40 % from 104 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
What does a man call true love? An erection.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men


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