The best jokes about men

The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
Why do men want to vote for a female President? Because we'd only have to pay her half as much.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: men, political, women
A man comes home from a tough day of work looking to unwind. After a relaxing dinner with his wife, they retired to bed. So, both go to their separate beds, however the man was not yet ready to slumber. The man called over to his wife, "My little boopey-boo, I'm lonely." So the woman gets out of bed and crosses the room to the husband. On the way she trips on the carpet and falls on her face. The husband with a concerned look on his face says, "Oh, did my little honey-woney fall on her little nosey-wosey?" The woman gets up and enters the man's bed. The two make passionate love and afterwards the women rolls out. As she is returning to her bed, she once again catches her foot on the carpet and falls flat on her face. The man looks over his shoulder at his wife lying on the floor and says, "Clumsy idiot."
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has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: food, husband, men, wife, work
A man walked into the doctor's office and said: "Doc, I've eaten something that disagrees with me." A voice from his stomach replies: "No you haven't."
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has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: doctor, men
Why is a man different from a PC? You only have to tell the PC once.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: computer, men
I only wanted to have a child, not marry one.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: marriage, men
How can you tell if a man is lying? You can see his lips moving.
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has 59.15 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: men
Why can't single women fart? They don't get an asshole till they get married.
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has 58.98 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: fat, marriage, men, women
A man went into the drugstore and asked for a deodorant. "The ball type?" asked the clerk. "No," said the dumb man. "It's for my underarms."
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has 58.98 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
A widowed elderly lady was sunbathing on a beach in Fort Myers, FL. She looked up and noticed that a man her age had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand next to hers and began reading a book.  Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "Hello sir, how are you today?" "Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book.  "I love the beach. Do you come here often?" she asked. "First time since my wife passed away 2 years ago," he replied and turned back to his book. "I'm sorry to hear that. My husband passed away 3 years ago and it is very lonely," she countered. "Do you live around here?" she asked. "Yes, I live over in Cape Coral," he answered and again resumed reading.  Trying to find a topic of common interest, and noticing that his book was about veterinary medicine, she persisted, "Do you like pussy cats?" With that, the man dropped his book, jumped off his blanket and on to hers, tore off her swimsuit and gave her the most passionate ride of her life!  When the cloud of sand began to settle, she gasped and asked the man, "How did you know that was what I wanted?" The man replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"
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has 58.81 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: age, husband, marriage, men, wife
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