A man walked into the doctor's office and said: "Doc, I've eaten something that disagrees with me."
A voice from his stomach replies: "No you haven't."
An exhausted hunter out in the woods stumbled across another hunter.
Hunter 1: "Am I glad to see you, I've been lost for three days."
Hunter 2: "Don't get too excited, friend, I've been lost for three weeks."
Two gays were at a dance.
As they were jigging about the floor with each other.
Two massive guys entered the hall 6 foot 6 20 stone and full of muscle One gay asked his mate "Is that the bouncers that have just come in?"
"No" grinned the other,"That's the raffle."
Men are like.....Bank Machines.
Once they withdraw they lose interest.
What is a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
What does a man call true love?
An erection.
Why is a man different from a PC?
You only have to tell the PC once.
How can you tell if a man is lying?
You can see his lips moving.
Why can't single women fart?
They don't get an asshole till they get married.
A man went into the drugstore and asked for a deodorant.
"The ball type?" asked the clerk.
"No," said the dumb man. "It's for my underarms."