The best jokes about men

A doctor says to his patient, "I have bad news and worse news." "Oh dear, what's the bad news?" asks the patient. The doctor replies, "You only have 24 hours to live." "That's terrible," said the patient. "How can the news possibly be worse?" The doctor replies, "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday."
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A young woman walks into a bar and sits down next to a man wearing a cowboy hat. "Excuse me sir but are you a real cowboy?" The man says, "Well I have a ranch and horses. I go to rodeos and raise cattle and other livestock, so yes I suppose I'm a real cowboy." The woman says, "Well I think I'm a l*sbian. Women are always on my mind whether I'm working eating driving or whatever its still the same. I cant get women off my mind. Yes I think I'm a l*sbian." The young woman gets up and leaves the coffee shop. A short time later a young guy comes in and sits down next to the man and asks him, "Sir are you a real cowboy?" To that the man replies, "Well I always thought I was, but just a few minutes ago I found out I'm a l*sbian!"
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A man, during his night prays, asks God: "Oh, Lord... Why you’ve made women so beautiful?" God replies: "So you can love them, my child." "Fine, but my Lord, why you’ve made them so stupid?" "So that they can love you back, my child...!"
Vote: has 77.43 % from 91 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, god, love, men, stupid
What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Vote: has 77.03 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
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A guy rang up to air port and said: "Do you mind me please to ask how long is from New York to Sanfransico? The lady replied "A moment..." Then the guy said "Thank you" and ceased conversation.
Vote: has 76.99 % from 84 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, men, stupid, time, travel
How do men sort their laundry? "Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".
Vote: has 76.89 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
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Mum: "How would you describe me?" Dad: "ABCDEFGHIJK" Mum: "What does that mean?" Dad: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, funny, graceful, helpful, intelligent." Mum: "What about JK?" Dad: "Just Kidding."
Vote: has 76.89 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, mean, men, women
A woman was paying for some items in a supermarket - a pint of milk, a packet of bacon, a small bag of rice and a few vegetables. The man at the checkout said, "I bet you're single, aren't you?" "Well yes, I am," the woman replied. "How did you know?" "Because you're really ugly," replied the man.
Vote: has 76.89 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, men, single, ugly, women
A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."
Vote: has 76.80 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
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How does a man take a bubble bath? He eats beans for dinner.
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More jokes about: men