The best morbid jokes

Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
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has 60.69 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, Halloween, morbid
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
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has 57.52 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: black humor, car, death, jewish, morbid
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
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has 56.84 % from 188 votes. More jokes about: black humor, desert island, morbid, navy, sex
Q: What's more offensive than a truck full of dead babies? A: Taking them out with pitchforks.
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has 56.63 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
Q: What is the point of Jewish football? A: To get the quarter back
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has 55.44 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: black humor, football, jewish, morbid
Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream. Q: How do you get them out? A: Chips.
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has 54.71 % from 143 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
Roses are red tulips are black. You'd look great with a knife in your back.
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has 54.57 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: death, morbid, poems
What's worse than 11 dead babies stapled to a tree? 1 dead baby stapled to 11 trees.
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has 53.93 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: dead baby, disgusting, morbid
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall? Art.
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has 53.80 % from 154 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
Q: How do you make a dead baby float? A: One scoop of ice cream and Two scoops of dead baby.
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has 53.78 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, food, morbid