All these Miley Cyrus jokes are whoreable.
Priest: Kim, do you take Kanye to be your lawfully wedded husband to love and cherish? Kim: I.. *Kanye grabs mic* Kanye: She do.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Eminem says "I'm not afraid". Chuck Norris says "I love the way you lie"
Every time you're sad, just remember that somewhere out there a tree grew for years and years, but was then destroyed and became material for a Justin Bieber notebook.
I unfollowed Taylor Swift on Twitter... I'm sure she's gonna write a song about it.
"Haven't I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant. "You have, Your Honor," the man answered hopefully. "I gave your son violin lessons last winter." "Ah, yes," recalled the judge. "Twenty years!"
Q: What 80's rock band is banned from New Orleans and why? A: The Scorpions. Every time they're in town, they rock you like a hurricane.
Mom can i buy some heels? No. Mom can i buy a bra? No. Mom can i buy a dress? No. Mom can i buy a barbie doll? No. You never let me buy anything! Shut up, Justin.
How do you know a man is really a bad dancer? When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.