If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
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I'm so hipster, even I've never heard of my favorite band.
Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist?
A: Cool music!
Q: Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
A: Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.
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Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it's cool.
What did the black epileptic have written on his t-shirt?
"Help I'm not break dancing"
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A little monster was learning to play the violin,' I'm good, aren't I?' he asked his big brother.
'You should be on the radio,' said his brother.
'You think I'm that good?'
'No, I think you're terrible, but if you were on the radio, I could switch you off !