A photon is checking into a hotel and the bellhop asks him "Do you have any luggage?" The photon replies, "Nope, I'm traveling light."
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you," The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home? "Where on Earth have you been?!"
A biologist, a chemist and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5th to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses 5th to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!"
Q: What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A: One molar solution.
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"? A: BaNa2
Q: Why was Pavlov's hair so soft? A: Classical conditioning.