Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here." Helium doesn't react.
3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
Two chemists go into a restaurant. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" - and he died.
Q: Why do Java programmers have to wear glasses? A: Because they don't C#.
Three statisticians are out hunting. Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away. The first statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the left. The second statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the right. The third statistician starts jumping up and down, yelling "We got him! We got him!"
Two students talk: "What are you reading?" "Quantum physics theory book." "But why are you reading it upside-down?" "It makes no difference anyway."
What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home? "Where on Earth have you been?!"
Hide a seek champion... ; Since 1958
A proton and a neutron are walking down the street. The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it." The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"