The best phone jokes

Customer: “My youngest son was surfing the web last night and to my shock he was at a British comedy site.” Tech Support: “Yes, what is the problem?” Customer: “The ‘.uk’ at the end — doesn’t that stand for United Kingdom?” Tech Support: “Yes.” Customer: “Just great — I knew it! He’s in trouble now! He was there for almost a half hour! How much does AOL charge for long distance?” Tech Support: “It does not work that way. You can surf anywhere without long distance charges.” Customer: “No, I am sure AOL charges extra. It doesn’t make any sense that they wouldn’t. England is a long way away, they would lose millions not to.” After trying to explain how the web worked, the customer refused to take my word and said she was going to call AOL. A while later she called back. Customer: “Well, AOL said you were correct; no long distance charge for overseas web sites. I do have another question I thought of after I hung up with AOL.” Tech Support: “Yes?” Customer: “Do you think they charge extra for long distance email?” Tech Support: “Trust me — they don’t.” Customer: “Wonderful! My oldest son works in Sweden. He sends us email, but I was always afraid to reply because I didn’t know how much it would cost, so I just called him on the phone. This will save us lots of money! Still if AOL was smart they would charge for this service.”
Vote: has 58.09 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: computer, IT, money, phone
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Pavlov walks into a bar. The phone rings, and he says, "Damn, I forgot to feed the dog."
Vote: has 56.84 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, bar, dog, phone
Teens are at an awkward stage in their lives. They know how to make phone calls they just don't know how to end them.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: life, phone, teen
A man and his wife agreed on a code to use in front of their kids when they want to have s*x. The code is: "Making a call." One day the man ask his son to tell his mother, that dad wants to make a phone call. The boy returns to his dad, that mom says she is out of order. Then he ask him to tell her, that dad will go outside to make a phone call. The boy returns, that mom says, "If you do so, she will open a central telephone station in the house."
Vote: has 55.71 % from 49 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: kids, marriage, phone, sex, wife
It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
Vote: has 55.34 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dinosaur, phone
What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around? Dead Siri-ous.
Vote: has 54.97 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT, phone, technology
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
Vote: has 54.66 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone, technology
Little Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving. “Wait a minute,” she said. “I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved.”
Vote: has 54.60 % from 145 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: little Johnny, phone, school, teacher
Why is the Apple still reporting record profits from iPhone sales? Because iPhone users are just as oblivious to the looming recession as they are to the people around them.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT, phone


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