Yo mamma so fat when she looked at the scale she yelled, "Thats not my weight, thats my phone number!"
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone. The ground is afraid to break it.
If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
What do the latest Iphone 6 applications do? Whiten teeth and perform laser eye surgery!
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
Q. What do prisoners use to call each other? A. Cell phones.
At recent trade talks the American representative offered to sell sophisticated American telephone technology to the Russians. American : "In the United States, anyone can pick up any phone and dial 9-1-1. This will record the call and connect them with the police." Russian : "In Russia we don't require that you dial anything."
Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.