The best phone jokes

A college freshman decided to try out for the football team. "Can you tackle?" asked the coach. "Watch this," said the freshman, who proceeded to run smack into a telephone pole, shattering it to splinters. "Wow," said the coach. "I'm impressed. Can you run?" "Of course I can run," said the freshman. He was off like a shot, and, in just over nine seconds, he had run a hundred yard dash. "Great!" enthused the coach. "But can you pass a football?" The freshman hesitated for a few seconds. "Well, sir," he said, "if I can swallow it, I can probably pass it."
Vote:
has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: college, football, phone, sport
A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I need to go fishing with the boss for the weekend. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in an hour to pick them up." He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off. Sunday night, he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?" "Oh yes, great! I think I really impressed the boss. But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas." "Oh, no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box."
Vote:
has 53.07 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: fish, marriage, phone, wife
Phone talk: "Is your boss there?" "No, he left on a trip." "A recovery trip, huh?" "I don’t think so... He took his wife with him!"
Vote:
has 53.04 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: marriage, phone, wife
A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled up newspaper round his head. 'What are you doing dear?' 'Swatting flies - I got 3 males and 2 females' 'How do you know what sex they were?' The man very confidently replied, "Easy - 3 were on the beer and 2 were on the phone."
Vote:
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: beer, husband, old people, phone, women
Chuck Norris installed iTunes... in Blackberry!
Vote:
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music, phone
What happens if you download the Princess Diana screensaver application? Your iphone will keep crashing!
Vote:
has 52.05 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, dirty, IT, phone
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
Vote:
has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
Vote:
has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone, technology
Chuck Norris has an iPhone with whole apple.
Vote:
has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
There's a senior citizen driving on the highway. His wife calls him on his cell phone and in a worried voice says, "George, be careful! I just heard on the radio that there was a madman driving the wrong way on Route 110!" George says, "I know, but there isn't just one, there are hundreds!"
Vote:
has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: driving, old people, phone, stupid, wife
<<<14151617
More jokes →
Page 14 of 18.