How do you tell when time is reversing? When a Jew drops a coin on the ground.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroid's.
What does a British potato say when it thinks something is wonderful? It's mashing!
How did the black guy escape from jail? He unscrewed the light bulbs.
What do you call 3 black guys sky diving? Air pollution.
There was this Mexican guy, Black guy, and Asian guy all working for the same construction company. At the beginning of the day the boss calls a meeting with them about today's work. They were all pretty new, so they had to be assigned jobs He says to the Mexican guy, "You're in charge of the cement." He says to the Black guy, "You're in charge of the dirt." He says to the Asian guy, "You're in charge of the supplies." After delegating out all the responsibilities he says, "I'm gonna be back at the end of the day to check on your work. It better be good or you're all fired." The boss was quite serious and had a reputation for being shrewd. They immediately get to work. At the end of the day, the boss comes back and checks on their work. He looks at the big pile of cement and says, "Nice work," to the Mexican guy. He looks at the big pile of dirt and says, "Nice work," to the Black guy. He looks around and can't find the Asian guy anywhere so he asks, "Where the heck is that Asian guy?" All of a sudden, the Asian jumps out from behind the big pile of dirt and yells, "SUPPLIES!"
Which traffic sign allows you to make a U-turn on a highway in Finland? You are approaching the Russian border.
What do you call a barn full of dead niggers? Out dated farm equipment.
The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign "Speedbird 206″: Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway." Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven." The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop. Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?" Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now." Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?" Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944 but I didn’t stop."