The best relationship jokes

I've spent the past two years looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer... but no one will do it.
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has 66.96 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: relationship, time, women
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: "What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?" "Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it…"
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has 66.88 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: men, relationship, time, Valentines day
A young Scottish lad and lassie were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands, and just gazing out over the loch. For several minutes they sat silently, then finally the girl looked at the boy and said, "A penny for your thoughts, Angus." "Well, uh, I was thinkin'... perhaps it's aboot time for a wee kiss." The girl blushed, then leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek. Then he blushed. Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch. After a while the girl spoke again. "Another penny for your thoughts, Angus." The young man knit his brow. "Well, now," he said, "my thoughts are a bit more serious this time." "Really?" said the girl in a whisper, filled with anticipation. "Aye," said the lad. "Din'na ye think it's aboot time ye paid me that first penny?"
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: money, relationship
A girlfriend said to me during sex that I should be a little more graceful, so I went to ballet classes!
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has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: communication, relationship, sex
Doctor: "And how is it going with your old ailment, Mr Smith?" Patient: "Very well, I've been divorced for half a year now."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: divorce, doctor, life, relationship
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman. The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution. "We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. " "Right, Darlin." The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
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has 63.26 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: couple, family, redneck, relationship, travel
Me: "I'm so lonely." Person: "Hey!" Me: "Leave me alone."
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: relationship, single
"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
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has 63.12 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: math, phone, relationship, student
I've asked my girlfriend to polish my medieval battle uniform while I go to the pub. She always said she wanted a night in, shining armour.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, relationship, romantic
"Does she have a boyfriend?" "Yes, a cute, strong and clever one." "What's the name?" "John, Michael and Bill."
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: relationship, women