The best school jokes

At school one day, the teacher was trying to approach the topic of sex education and asked her students if they'd ever seen anything that was related to sex education on TV. Mary raised her hand and said she had seen a movie about women having babies. "Great," said the teacher, "that's very important." Then Judy raised her hand and told the teacher she had seen a TV show about people getting married. "Well, that has to do with it too," said the teacher. Then Johnny raised his hand and said he had seen a western where some Indians came riding over the hill and John Wayne shot them all. The teacher said, "Well, Johnny, that really doesn't have anything to do with sex education." "Yes it does," said Johnny, " it taught those Indians not to f**k with John Wayne."
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has 63.09 % from 148 votes. More jokes about: baby, little Johnny, school, sex, teacher
I'll be honest. I did not graduate at the top of my class. In fact, I was so close to the bottom, my sheepskin had a tail.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: graduation, school, student
Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire. Much to their relief she smiled and said, "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper." Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said, "First Question was which tire was flat?"
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: car, school, teacher
The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, “Now I’ll show you this frog in my pocket.” He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, “That’s funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch.”
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has 62.69 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: school
Little Johnny comes home from his first day of school. His mother asks, "What did you learn in school today?" Little Johnny replies, "Not much. They want me back tomorrow.
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has 62.45 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, school
Why do mexicans walk around the school like they own the place? Cause there dad built it and there mom cleans it at night.
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has 62.43 % from 183 votes. More jokes about: dad, mexican, racist, school
Why was the cannibal expelled from school? Because he kept buttering up the teacher.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. Timmy stood up and said, "My mom is a doctor!" Sarah stood up and said, "My father is a professor!" Little Johnny stood up and said, "My dad is a piano player in a whorehouse!" The teacher couldn't believe what she's had just heard, so she made a point of calling Little Johnny's father that evening to discuss the situation. Little Johnny's father explained, "Actually, I'm a law attorney, but how am I supposed to explain that to a seven year old kid!"
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: doctor, lawyer, school, student, teacher
TEACHER : What is further away, Australia or the Moon? Pupil : Australia, you can see the Moon at night.
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: school
Malcolm: Miss Wilson can I go to the loo? Miss Wilson: In two minutes Malcolm. Do your alphabet first. Malcolm: Ok Miss Wilson. abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz. Miss Wilson: Very good, Malcolm, but where's the p? Malcolm: Miss, it's running down my leg!
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, school
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