The best school jokes

Teacher: "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?" Ramu: "The moon". Teacher: "Why?" Ramu: "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
Vote: has 57.82 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school, teacher
„And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?" asks mother. „Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"
Vote: has 57.55 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, little Johnny, school
Joe: What’s the king of all school supplies? Moe: I don’t know. What? Joe: The ruler.
Vote: has 57.27 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
DEPT OF STATISTICS: All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve. DEPT OF PSYCHOLOGY: Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind. DEPT OF HISTORY: All students get the same grade they got last year. DEPT OF RELIGION: Grade is determined by God. DEPT OF PHILOSOPHY: What is a grade? LAW SCHOOL: Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A. DEPT OF MATHEMATICS: Grades are variable. DEPT OF LOGIC: If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A else the student will not receive an A. DEPT OF COMPUTER SCIENCE: Random number generator determines grade. MUSIC DEPARTMENT: Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note (+ and - would be sharp and flat respectively). DEPT OF PHYSICAL EDUCATION: Everybody gets an A.
Vote: has 57.17 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: history, math, religious, school
One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information" "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school, science, student
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love. In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, college, drunk, love, school
Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school? Leonard: Why? Jacob: She had bright students!
Vote: has 57.10 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

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Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
Vote: has 57.10 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, kids, little Johnny, school, teacher
Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren’t the best teacher in the school.
Vote: has 56.98 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, school