Q: What's the first thing elves learn in school? A: The "elf"-abet!
Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her teacher asked her a question. He inquired, “What grows to 10 times its original size when excited?” Jane blushed and said that she didn't know. Jimmy raised his hand and said, “I know! The pupil of the eye.” The teacher replied, “Yes, very good Jimmy.” The the teacher turned to Jane and said, “Jane I have three things to say to you: One -- you have a very dirty mind. Two -- you haven't been studying hard enough. And three -- you're going to be very disappointed!”
There is a 3 story apartment building with 1 apartment on each floor. A white family lives on the top floor. A mexican family lives on the second floor. A nigger family lives on the botom floor. At 2:00 PM in the afternoon a terrrible tornado hits the building, totally destroying it. Which family lived? The White family, because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.
Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel so well. Father: Where does it hurt? Son: In school.
Teacher: Why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? Student: You told me not to use tables.
A father went to take his daughter from school. While waiting, he heard her talking with a classmate of hers "I worry so much-..! My dad works 16 hours a day so he can build a dream house for when I grow up. My mom spends her days cooking for me, making deserts and tiding my room so I can have fun. I worry. I’m so worried!" "With that kind of parents you have nothing to worry about," her friend told her. "Yeah, but what if... What if they... What if they... ESCAPE?"
Teacher: "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?" Ramu: "The moon". Teacher: "Why?" Ramu: "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher said, it was a peace of cake.
Joe: What’s the king of all school supplies? Moe: I don’t know. What? Joe: The ruler.
Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun. Everyone must attend it. Mary: No madam! I will not be able to attend it. Teacher: Why? Mary: My mother will not allow me to go so far!