Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Student: A teacher!
A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school...
Teacher: "Whats your name?"
Boy: "Nadir"
Teacher: "No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today."
Boy went home and his mother asked: "How was the day Nadir?"
Boy: "I am an American now, so call me Johnny."
Mom and Dad both got offended and beat him up. Next day he was back to school all bruised...
Teacher: "What happened Johnny?"
Boy: "Ma'm, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani terrorists."
Johnny comes back home from school and tells his father, "Dad, tomorrow you are invited to a special parent meetings at school."
"How much special?"
"Well, just me, you, the director and two investigators from the FBI."
Vote:
Ms.Battle: Henry, I hope I didn't see you copying Casey's math test.
Henry: I hope you didn't either.
You know your f*cked when the Asian says, "shit", during the test.
Teacher: Did you father help your with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
Peter: What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?
Ted: What?
Peter: A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”
A mom calls out to her son "Harry! Wake up! You'll be late for school."
The son replies, "Mom I don't want to go to school!
The teachers and students hate me!
Give me one reason I should go!"
The mom says back, "You should go because you're the principal!"
Teacher: Students draw a picture of bacteria.
Student: Here it is Mam!
Teacher: Where? It Is Blank.
Student: you told that bacteria cannot be seen with naked eye!
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family.
One smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering.
When silence is restored the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Not an excuse. You can use your other hand to write with."