The best school jokes

A gentleman wanders around the campus of a school looking for the library. He approaches a student and asked, “Excuse me young man. Would you be good enough and tell me where the library is at?” The student, in a very arrogant and belittling tone, replied, “I sorry, sir, but at this school, we are taught never to end a sentence with a preposition!” The gentleman smiled, and in a very apologetic tone replied, “I beg your pardon. Please allow me to rephrase my question. Would you be good enough to tell me where the library is at, idiot?”
has 79.26 % from 291 votes. More jokes about: school
Ms.Battle: Henry, I hope I didn't see you copying Casey's math test. Henry: I hope you didn't either.
has 79.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: school
Teacher: Did you father help your with your homework? Student: No, he did it all by himself.
has 79.10 % from 198 votes. More jokes about: school
Pupil: "Would you punish me for something I didn't do?" Teacher: "Of course not." Pupil: "Good, because I haven't done my homework."
has 79.06 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: school
A private school was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lip stick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.  Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.  Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.  To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.  There are teachers... and then there are educators.
has 78.99 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
Johnny comes back home from school and tells his father, "Dad, tomorrow you are invited to a special parent meetings at school." "How much special?" "Well, just me, you, the director and two investigators from the FBI."
has 78.97 % from 365 votes. More jokes about: cop, dad, little Johnny, school
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family. One smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Not an excuse. You can use your other hand to write with."
has 78.91 % from 2476 votes. More jokes about: death, family, school, sex, teacher
Teacher: Students draw a picture of bacteria. Student: Here it is Mam! Teacher: Where? It Is Blank. Student: you told that bacteria cannot be seen with naked eye!
has 78.90 % from 228 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher
Peter: What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? Ted: What? Peter: A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”
has 78.89 % from 212 votes. More jokes about: school
School is like a boner, long and hard. Unless you're Asian...
has 78.83 % from 526 votes. More jokes about: racist, school
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