Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
Teacher: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Ramu: Yes it's really strange.
I've got another pair of the same at home.
Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.
What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
Teacher: Ramu, give me a sentence starting with " I ".
Ramu: I is...
Teacher: No, Ramu. Always say, "I am."
Ramu: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
Teacher: “Why are you late?”
Boy: “Because of a sign down the road.”
Teacher: “What does a sign have to do with your being late?”
Boy: “The sign said, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow!’”
What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says ‘chew chew chew’.
One day a medical professor and his class were standing over a corpse and the professor said, "There are two things to being a medical forensicist. First: Don't fear anything."
After saying that, the professor shoved his middle finger up the corpse's anus and licked it. He then told the class to do the same.
After hesitating, they all did it.
"Next," the professor said, "you have to have a key observation finger. Thus, I licked my index finger."
I hated my job as an origami teacher. Too much paperwork.
Teacher: Ramu, why do you always get so dirty?
Ramu: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.