The best school jokes

When a teacher closes his eyes, why should it remind him of an empty classroom? Because there are no pupils to see!
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: school
Q:Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm the school bell. A: Take These tablets and if they don't work give me a ring in the morning.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life, school, work
Hunter: What has given Mr. Bubbles nightmares since elementary school? Josh: Beats me. Hunter: Pop quizzes!
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: school
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. “Why of course”, comes the reply. The first man then asks: “Where are you from?” “I’m from Scotland”, replies the second man. The first man responds: “You don’t say, I’m from Scotland too! Let’s have another round to Scotland.” “Of Course”, replies the second man. Curious, the first man then asks: “Where in Scotland are you from?” “Aberdeen”, comes the reply. “I can’t believe it”, says the first man. “I’m from Aberdeen too! Let’s have another drink to Aberdeen.” “Of course”, replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: “What school did you go to?” “Saint Andrews”, replies the second man. “I graduated in ’62.” “This is unbelievable!”, the first man says. “I went to Saint Andrews and graduated in ’62, too!” About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. “What’s been going on?”, he asks the bartender “Nothing much,” replies the bartender. “The MacClyde twins are drunk again.”, because there ain’t no way I can pass that test.”anisms.
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, drunk, school
There are three 6th grade girls: a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Which one has the biggest tits? The blonde....she's 18.
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has 39.18 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: blonde, ginger, school
What is a teacher's favorite kind of music? Class-ical.
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has 38.34 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: music, school, teacher
Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
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has 38.00 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: school
Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning. Class: Hooray! Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: school
One day a medical professor and his class were standing over a corpse and the professor said, "There are two things to being a medical forensicist. First: Don't fear anything." After saying that, the professor shoved his middle finger up the corpse's anus and licked it. He then told the class to do the same. After hesitating, they all did it. "Next," the professor said, "you have to have a key observation finger. Thus, I licked my index finger."
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has 37.83 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: school, science, student, teacher
At school, a soldier spoke to Johnny's class. Johnny felt enthusiastic about joining the military, so he went home and told his dad. To his surprise, this was the biggest step forward in his life, so his dad decided to explain the military to him. "Son, I'll teach you what you need to know about the military. The Army and Navy are the only two REAL branches of our military. The Marine Corps is a cult. The Coast Guard is playing a game called 'Pretend Navy Since 1915'." So Johnny asks his dad, "what about the Air Force?" Johnny's dad explained to him, "well son, the Air Force is like a giant corporation. Just a bunch of people sitting at desks playing Flight Simulator and bullshitting with each other." By that time, Johnny was amazed and decided he wanted to join the military, but wanted to know what his daddy did. "What did you do in the military, dad?" "Well son, I spoke Chinese and shot at the Americans in Vietnam."
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has 37.36 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: air force, little Johnny, military, navy, school
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