The best science jokes

One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. All of a sudden, the car broke down. The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke." The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas." The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system." All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?" The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."
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Little Johnny's teacher asks, "What is the chemical formula for water?" Little Johnny replies, "HIJKLMNO"! The teacher, puzzled, asks, "What on Earth are you talking about?" Little Johnny replies, "Yesterday you said it was H to O!"
Vote: has 79.07 % from 398 votes. Send joke:

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According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
Vote: has 79.06 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

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When Einstein died and arrived at the gates of heaven, St. Peter wouldn’t let him in until he proved his identity. Einstein scribbled out a couple of his equations, and was admitted into paradise. And when Picasso died, St. Peter asked, “How do I know you’re Picasso?” Picasso sketched out a couple of his masterpieces. St. Peter was convinced and let him in. When George W. Bush died, he went to heaven and met the man at the gates. “How can you prove to me you’re George W. Bush?” Saint Peter said. Bush replied, “Well heck, I don’t know.” St. Peter says, “Well, Albert Einstein showed me his equations and Picasso drew his famous pictures. What can you do to prove you’re George W. Bush?” Bush replies, “Who are Albert Einstein and Picasso?” St. Peter says, “It must be you, George, c’mon on in.”
Vote: has 78.01 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

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The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
Vote: has 76.51 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: chemistry, geek, science
"Shay, buddy, whats a Breathalyzer?" asked one drunk to his friend at the next barstool. "Well, Id have to say that its a bag that tells you when youve drunk way too much," answered the equally wasted gent. "Ah hell, whaddya know? Ive been married to one of those for years!"
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? A: HeHe
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Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
Vote: has 75.18 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
Vote: has 75.03 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
Vote: has 74.83 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

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