If you're feeling down, I can feel you up.
Knock-Knock Who is there? A long penis with a naked head. Come in please we were waiting for you.
Q: What does the receptionist at the sperm clinic say when clients are leaving? A: “Thanks for coming!”
Got my wife a dildo and some shoes for her birthday. If she doesn't like the shoes, she can go fuck herself.
I wish my girlfriend had warned me about the ceiling mirror in her bedroom. I lay down ready for her, then ran out screaming – I’d looked up and thought I was being attacked by a naked skydiver.
Sex isn’t the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.
What’s a man’s ultimate embarrassment? Walking into a wall with an erection and hurting his nose.
What are the small bumps around women’s nipples? It’s Braille for ‘suck here’.
Why do women need guys? Vibrators don’t usually pay for drinks.
Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.