The best sex jokes

Smoke a smoke Not a butt Fuck a virgin Not a slut.
Vote: has 62.04 % from 52 votes. Send joke:

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What’s the difference between ‘Oooh!’ and ‘Aaah!’? About three inches.
Vote: has 61.96 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

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What happened when the blonde tried to give her boyfriend a blow-job while he was driving? They both fell off the motorcycle.
Vote: has 61.95 % from 85 votes. Send joke:

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A tourist in Sweden is drinking in a bar when an attractive woman sits next to him. ‘Hello,’ he says. ‘Do you speak English?’ ‘Oh I speaking not much English,’ replies the woman. ‘How much?’ asks the man. The woman replies, ‘200 Kroner.’
Vote: has 61.91 % from 70 votes. Send joke:

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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 95%. It's called a Wedding Cake.
Vote: has 61.89 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, science, sex, wedding, women
The was a man named George who got a new job. His fellow employees always met for a round of golf every Saturday. They asked George to meet them at 10:00 Saturday morning. George replied that he would love to meet them, but he may be 10 minutes late. On Saturday morning George was there at exactly 10:00. He golfed right handed and won the round. Next Saturday rolls around, and George says that he will be there, but he may be 10 minutes late again. He shows up right on time, golfs left handed, and wins the round. This continues for the next few weeks, with Geoge always saying that he may be 10 minutes late, and then always winning the round golfing, either left or right handed. The other employees are getting tired of this, and decided to ask him what the deal was. They said, ''George, every Saturday you say you may be ten minutes late. You never are. Then you show up and golf with either right handed or left handed, and always win. What is up with that?'' George replies, ''Well, I am a very superstitious kind of guy. Every Saturday when I wake up, I look over at my wife. If she is sleeping on her left side, I golf left handed. If she is sleeping on her right side, I golf right handed.'' ''Well,'' one of the employees questioned, ''What happens if she is laying on her back?'' George replies, ''Then I am 10 minutes late.''
Vote: has 61.71 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, sport, time, wife, work
Robinson came home in great excitement and said to his wife, “You’ll never believe it, dear, but I’ve discovered an entirely new position for lovemaking.” “Really,” said Mrs. Robinson, interested at once. “What is it?” “Back to back.” “But that’s crazy. We can’t do anything back to back.” “Yes we can. I’ve persuaded another couple to help out.”
Vote: has 61.71 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, love, sex, wife
A guy gets out of the V.D. Hospital and decides to a hire a hooker, since he's been without for so long. Before long, he brings one home, and they have sex four times. After it's over, he turns to her and tells her he hasn't had sex in four months because of being in the V.D. Hospital. "How's the food there?" asks the hooker. "Because I'm going in there tomorrow!"
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How can you tell if your girlfriend really likes you? A: If you stick your hand in her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse.
Vote: has 61.59 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What does a good steak have in common with good sex? A: They're both very rare.
Vote: has 61.59 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

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