The best sex jokes

You are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
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has 66.75 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, flirt, life, sex
AT WORK, Michael: Why you white guys always so happy? Casey: Because I make love to my wife every morning before work. Michael: Say whaaat? You get her to make love EVERY morning? How do you do that? Casey: It's easy, I just say a poem, women love poems and will fall for them all the time. Michael: Ok, what kind of poem can you say to make her make love every morning? Casey: I say, "blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes of blue, I love to wake up and make love to you. Michael: HAHAAA she falls for that? Casey: yes you should try it. NEXT DAY TYRONE COMES IN WITH BLACK EYE FAT LIP AND A TOOTH MISSING. Casey: What happened to you? Michael: Well, I said a poem to my wife and she didn't like it. Casey: She didn't like it? What did you say? Michael: Nappy head, nappy head, eyes like a frog, if I could roll your fat ass over I would do you like a dog.
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has 66.74 % from 247 votes. More jokes about: black people, poems, sex, white people
Yo mama so fat, when your dad tried eating your mom's pussy his head stuck in.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Yo mama
An old lady goes to her doctor and asks for contraceptive tablets, claiming they help her sleep at night. ‘Why would contraceptive pills make you sleep any better than normal?’ asks the doctor. The old lady replies, ‘Because I put them in my grandaughter’s coffee.’
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has 66.71 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: sex
This old guy goes into a church in a small town in the hills of Italy and asks the priest to hear his confession. The priest listens and then asks, "Is there anything else?" The old guy says, "During the war, when I was young, a beautiful Germam girl came to my farm after escaping and asked me if I would hide her. I told her I would if she provided me with sexual favors." The priest replies, "Don't worry about it. It was wartime and you both were under a lot of pressure." The old guy says, "Does that mean that I have to tell her that the war is over?"
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has 66.69 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: church, life, priest, sex, war
3 Stages of Sex: 1. House Sex - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house, in every room. 2. Bedroom Sex - After you've been married for a while and you just have sex in the bedroom. 3. Hall Sex - After you've been married for many years, and you just pass each other in the hall and say, "F**k you!"
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: life, marriage, sex
My girlfriend has incredible sexual skills. I almost had a heart attack when I saw the video!
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, relationship, sex, technology
What do a gynecologist, and a pizza delivery guy have in common? They both can smell it, but they can't eat it!
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has 66.62 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: life, sex
Yo mama is so fat whenever I want to make sex I would request her to fart in order to find the address of her ass.
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has 66.61 % from 194 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, fat, sex, Yo mama
Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Valentines day
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