Man to a woman: "Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?" Woman: "No." Man: "Lets have lunch sometime…"
Q: Why did Daft Punk spend the night with a Leprechaun? A: He was "Up all night to get lucky"
Yo mama's so fat that, after sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch!
Harry is very quick with the ladies, before they can tell him they’re not that sort of girl, it’s usually too late.
A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of humor!"
Worst way to ask for anal: "Aww come on...I bet my dick is tiny compared to some of the shits you've taken!"
Programming is like sex One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
The aged patient doddered into the doctor’s office with a serious complaint. "Doc, you’ve got to do something to lower my sex drive." "Come on now Mr Peters," the doctor said, "your sex drives all in your head." "Thats what I mean, you’ve got to lower it a little."
Q. What do you call a rabbit with a bent dick? A. Fucks Funny!
A beautiful woman sits next to a drunk in a bar. He turns to her and says, ‘Hey, honey. How about you and me getting it on? I’ve got a couple of pounds and it looks like you could use the money.’ The woman turns to him and says, ‘What makes you think I charge by the inch?’