The best sex jokes

An old couple decide to get married after years of courting. They sit down to discuss the marriage arrangements and the prospective bridegroom brings up the subject of sex. ‘Oh dear,’ says his aging fiancée. ‘As far as sex goes I’d have to say, infrequently.’ ‘Pardon?’ replies the bridegroom. ‘Was that one word or two?’
Vote:
has 66.09 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: sex
That awkward moment when you're about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror.
Vote:
has 66.08 % from 139 votes. More jokes about: life, sex
My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207...
Vote:
has 66.05 % from 264 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Q: How do you know when a machanic has had sex? A: Two of his fingers are clean.
Vote:
has 66.03 % from 308 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mechanic, sex
Question: How can you tell if your wife is dead? Answer: The sex will be the same but the dishes will pile up.
Vote:
has 65.94 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: death, sex, wife, women
A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. "Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks. "No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
Vote:
has 65.93 % from 435 votes. More jokes about: sex, ugly
If your born in September, its pretty safe to assume your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!
Vote:
has 65.83 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: birthday, kids, new year, sex
There are three types of sex in a marriage. The first one is Kitchen Sex. This is when you are newlyweds, and you're still having fun, so you do it anywhere, anytime - but mostly the kitchen. The second type is Bedroom Sex. This is when you have settled down a bit and probably have kids, so you can't do it anywhere except the bedroom. The third type of sex is Hallway Sex. This is when you pass each other in the hall and say, "Screw you." But there's also a fourth kind called Courtroom Sex. This is when you are getting a divorce and you try to screw each other in public.
Vote:
has 65.80 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: marriage, sex
Kid to her mother: "If you hurt me I'll make you pregnant by a needle." Mother: "How? My sweet it isn't possible." Kid: "I'll insert the needle to daddy's condom!"
Vote:
has 65.76 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: baby, kids, mean, sex, vulgar
Warning ladies! Never trust a man who calls you "SEXY". This is why. When he removes the letter 'Y' it means you're down for "SEX". After sex, he will remove the letter "S" and start calling you his "EX".
Vote:
has 65.63 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: men, sex, women
<<<41424344
More jokes →
Page 41 of 88.